Be Cool: Common Pitfalls For The C5 Owner, And how To Avoid Them

[Patrick]

We Interrupt This Thread For the Following Public Service Announcement:

There is now an Addendum to the Be Cool Guide, specifically for C6 Owners. I encourage any C6 owners to carefully read this new addition.

That is all.

We Know Return To You To Your Regularly Scheduled Thread.

 

[ericw]

What a marvelous piece of writing - thank you Patrick!

Only having had an object of all our affection in the garage for a little over a year now, I've already personally observed most of the stated conditions and events depicted are true!

However, two phrases appear to somewhat conflict (to this caffeine addict):
(1) "And a word about those high-energy drinks: ladies and gentlemen, you drive a Corvette which (depending on whether it’s Coupe/Convertible or Z06) produces 365 to 405 Horsepower. Why on earth does the driver need to be operating with an even higher octane rating than the car?"

(2)"the driver (and passenger) of the Corvette must be the organic equal to the machine in all respects."

So I am now guessing that in order to at least maintain one's Coolness Quotient points, it's OK for the driver/passenger to have an equal octane rating as the car, but not to exceed it...

 

[Patrick]

So I am now guessing that in order to at least maintain one's Coolness Quotient points, it's OK for the driver/passenger to have an equal octane rating as the car, but not to exceed it...

An excellent question, Eric! Well done! Bank 42 coolness points for that observation! :cool

One must remember that the Corvette is a machine, responsive to the person operating it. This is where the organic meets the synthetic. And that meeting reveals something crucial: the operator of a Corvette has a unique responsibility to assume control.

Operating above the octane rating of the car leads to recklessness. You must stand back from your Corvette's octane rating, in order to have a positive sense of control. So I give you these three digits: H, 2, O.

A well hyrdrated Corvette owner is a Cool Corvette owner. Cheers!


-Patrick

 

[sgtrjs]

Part I:
Getting Out of the Garage.

...And a word about those high-energy drinks: ladies and gentlemen, you drive a Corvette which (depending on whether it’s Coupe/Convertible or Z06) produces 365 to 405 Horsepower...

It only took 2 years to notice, but shouldn't that be 345 to 405?

 

[Fullback32]

Patrick,

I am glad this thread came back up as I had not seen it before. Great stuff! I now know the proper way to get in and out of my 'vette. I think it might be worth adding that the "Mullet" hairstyle is unacceptable for Corvette owners....get thee a Camaro. Though you would assume that any Corvette owner would know better so it should go without saying.

 

[Patrick]

It only took 2 years to notice, but shouldn't that be 345 to 405?

You're complaining that I spotted you 20 HP? And you didn't even need those ricer stickers that promise a 10 HP gain just for putting them on the car.

 

[Patrick]

Patrick,

I am glad this thread came back up as I had not seen it before. Great stuff! I now know the proper way to get in and out of my 'vette. I think it might be worth adding that the "Mullet" hairstyle is unacceptable for Corvette owners....get thee a Camaro. Though you would assume that any Corvette owner would know better so it should go without saying.

The "mullet" is unacceptable anywhere, under any conditions, regardless of car.
:L

 

[Remo]

Think Again

I think it might be worth adding that the "Mullet" hairstyle is unacceptable for Corvette owners....get thee a Camaro. Though you would assume that any Corvette owner would know better so it should go without saying.

OMG!!!!

 

[ericw]

An excellent question, Eric! Well done! Bank 42 coolness points for that observation! :cool



-Patrick

What would I do without this forum?? Here I was blindly assuming that one could only accumulate one Corvette Coolness Quotient point per "incident"...! Live and learn.

Thanks Patrick! (I'm off to the CCQ bank now.)

Eric

 

[Patrick]

<bump!>

It's that time of year, folks. Corvettes are coming out of garages, Zaino and Meguirs debates are once again in vogue. And lost in all this is the importance of cool. I jump this back to the top of the forum as a public service, and urge you to go back to the first page and read this critically important document again.

That is all.


-Patrick

 

[Remo]

Yes Cool Master

I've done as you instructed. I'm ready for the new season
and feeling very cool.
Remo:cool

 

[Patrick]

I've done as you instructed. I'm ready for the new season
and feeling very cool.
Remo:cool

Well done, Remo. And may I say, you wear purple well. Not many men can do that.

 

[hoosierdaddy]

I got to have one of those blue stipped jackets Remo; was that special made for you and if so can I get the name of your tailor:L

Bill

 

[coastalrap]

Reading through this thread made me thankful to be lucky enough to hone my Corvette coolness all year long.

No wonder us Florida peeps are not only better golfers but have a higher coolness quotient than our northern contemporaries.

There is absolutely no truth to the rumors that we buy verts because there is room for walkers in the trunk. I think that was started by someone in Jersey.

 

[hoosierdaddy]

Reading through this thread made me thankful to be lucky enough to hone my Corvette coolness all year long.

No wonder us Florida peeps are not only better golfers but have a higher coolness quotient than our northern contemporaries.

There is absolutely no truth to the rumors that we buy verts because there is room for walkers in the trunk. I think that was started by someone in Jersey.

Not feelin this at all, I might go along with the "walkers in the trunk" though and winter does suck out loud :ugh

Bill