Be Cool: Common Pitfalls For The C5 Owner, And how To Avoid Them

[Patrick]

Patrick:

Very enjoyable read and a lot of truth to the individual scenarios.:L

Thanks

rp427

Perfect:BOW

Thanks, guys. Nice to see this thread revived.

Maintaining your coolness quotient at a time of year when your Corvette is safely tucked up for winter can be a huge challenge. Just remember, St. Patrick's Day is only two months away, so circle your calendars and mark that as the date when you start working in earnest on maintaining optimum coolness ratios.


-Patrick

 

[STi-to-Z06]

Great read! Thanks! I understand my coolness factor much better now, as well as my midnight urges to go and stare at her....

 

[LittleRedFlatBack]

Responsibility

I didn't realize that a C5 owner had so much responsibiliy. I'm glad my first time filling with gas was at night with nobody watching.

Great thread Patrick.:cool I'll study up and try to do better.

 

[joeracer49]

Excellent bit of prose. I just hope your right and I can take my beastie out of hibernation on St Pat's Day. W/ all the snow we're having in Milwaukee, there will still be snow, salt and general winter crud on the roads until well into April. In fact it is snowing again as I write this post.:cool

 

[hoosierdaddy]

Winter pretty much SUCKS that's for sure!!!!

Bill

 

[Remo]

Pardon Me Sonny - Could You Help Me?

Part I:
Ingress & Egress. The truly cool Corvette owner understands that there is only one correct way to get into and out of your Corvette. Don’t stick a foot into the pedal well and then clumsily collapse behind the wheel with one foot still outside the car. Instead, open the driver’s door and stand looking away from the car, so that your back is exposed to the interior. Begin to lean forward slightly and sit, until you are seated in the driver’s seat and bring your head into the car. Then, and only then, swing your feet over the door sill and into the car. Reverse these steps to exit. With practice, it becomes easy, and it avoids the common pitfall of hitting your head on the frame as you try to get in and out.

Patrick - this gets a little more challenging when you're over sixty and the car has been lowered.
Remo:cool

 

[Patrick]

Patrick - this gets a little more challenging when you're over sixty and the car has been lowered.
Remo:cool

Remo,
I sympathize- well, as much as I can for someone whose "golden years" are still 30 years away. But consider this: you have done a Lingenfelter upgrade to your Corvette, and had it lowered. This had the effect of increasing it's coolness rating quite dramatically. Thus, in its own way, your Corvette has now challenged you to keep up.

You must exercise, Remo. Work on those knees and do some exercises to strengthen the lower back. And once the staff here at CAC have deemed it safe to remove you from your winter meds, you're going to need to go on a Prune juice regimine to ensure you remain regular. If all else fails, consider accupuncture.

Now that we're in February, and the end of the winter season is in sight, you must start getting ready to hit the summer season. The challenge has been issued by your Corvette, and as a proud Corvette owner, Remo, you are obligated to respond.

-Patrick

 

[DRTH VTR]

Remo-
In order to enter and exit the vehicle as Patrick has described, keep one image in mind. This is how a woman in a skirt would get in and out.



PS
That is exactly how this girly-man has to do it as well. Do NOT picture me in a miniskirt, as no amount of winter meds can help you cope with that image. :eyerole

 

[hoosierdaddy]

If there is another way to get in a Corvette I wouldn't know about it, pretty much in reverse to get out. But again if there are different techiques for entering and exiting a Corvette please share.

Bill

 

[Remo]

.

You must exercise, Remo. Work on those knees and do some exercises to strengthen the lower back. And once the staff here at CAC have deemed it safe to remove you from your winter meds, you're going to need to go on a Prune juice regimine to ensure you remain regular.
-Patrick

Patrick - thanks for the tip. I started last night and here's a shot of me working out. No I'm not the big guy - I'm the skinny white haired guy in the background. Can't wait for the prune juice regimine. BTW nurse Alexis agrees with your recommendations. You do remember nurse Alexis don't you?
Remo:cool

 

[Patrick]

Thread Revival Time!

Folks, we are now on the threshold of another March, which means Corvette season will soon be here. As a public service, I renew this thread to aid in the re-acquisition of any Coolness Quotient skills which may have atrophied over the long, cold winter.

For new members, I encourage you to go back to page 1 of this thread, and read up on how important the relationship between your Corvette and you, as a matter of coolness, truly is.

Time to develop a regimen for exercising your coolness, and be ready for the arrival of Spring!

 

[hoosierdaddy]

I have starting to get into the rigid regime of more frequent trips on the elliptical trainer by Pro-Form, no that's not a bra! As a balding male over 60 I can use all the help I can get, maybe even the bra

Good bye winter blues and I'll make do with the getting in and out of the Vette the best I can :W Spring is about the sprung anyway

Bill

 

[WLS Ruby 93]

Corvette Coolness

Patrick,
Great dissertation; your "CQ" (Coolness quotient) has been kicked up a couple of notches. I belly laughed out loud as least 5 times during the reading. It certainly applies to ALL Corvette owners.
Yes, I am also suffering from 'Cabin Fever' but hang in there the Vernal (Spring) Equinox is close at hand and all the C5 sister ships will be firing up for good cruising.
To keep from going completely daffy in winter I carefully lower the "Scarlet Avenger", (which is berthed on my lift 5 feet off the floor so the rodents can't make it their winter condo), and take it out for a spin on those cool, dry, bright sunny winter days on the winding country roads of Central Virginia....then, all is right with the universe.
Jet Jackson eat your heart out! (Yep, I'm that age)
Be well and enjoy, life is not a dress rehearsal.

Keep 'em rollin' :W....... and glistening :cool !
Bill

 

[hoosierdaddy]

Here, here!!! Well said!

 

[WetteVette]

Cool!

Great write-up! You, my friend, understand the Corvette, the Corvette driver, and the Corvette "experience"! A must read for any Corvette owner!

 

[Patrick]

Patrick,
Great dissertation; your "CQ" (Coolness quotient) has been kicked up a couple of notches. I belly laughed out loud as least 5 times during the reading. It certainly applies to ALL Corvette owners.
Yes, I am also suffering from 'Cabin Fever' but hang in there the Vernal (Spring) Equinox is close at hand and all the C5 sister ships will be firing up for good cruising.
To keep from going completely daffy in winter I carefully lower the "Scarlet Avenger", (which is berthed on my lift 5 feet off the floor so the rodents can't make it their winter condo), and take it out for a spin on those cool, dry, bright sunny winter days on the winding country roads of Central Virginia....then, all is right with the universe.
Jet Jackson eat your heart out! (Yep, I'm that age)
Be well and enjoy, life is not a dress rehearsal.

Keep 'em rollin' :W....... and glistening :cool !
Bill

Great write-up! You, my friend, understand the Corvette, the Corvette driver, and the Corvette "experience"! A must read for any Corvette owner!

I'm only too happy to have helped nudge your Corvette Coolness Quotients in the right direction.

Like I said, I did this as a public service- This is essential knowledge all Corvette owners and enthusiasts must know, and not making this information widely available to all within the Corvette community would almost certainly lead to a global crisis of declining cool. I can't, in good conscience, allow that to happen.
:cool

 

[njlouc]

Patrick -
I am new to Corvettedom, so i particularly appreciated your excellent treatise on Corvette responsibilities (aka coolness).
BTW I enter and exit the way you describe, it's the only way for me. - Thanks for the enjoyable read.

 

[Remo]

Doing What I Can

You must exercise, Remo. Work on those knees and do some exercises to strengthen the lower back. And once the staff here at CAC have deemed it safe to remove you from your winter meds, you're going to need to go on a Prune juice regimine to ensure you remain regular. If all else fails, consider accupuncture.

Now that we're in February, and the end of the winter season is in sight, you must start getting ready to hit the summer season. The challenge has been issued by your Corvette, and as a proud Corvette owner, Remo, you are obligated to respond.

-Patrick

Patrick - I 've been working out per your recommendation. BTW, what the heck was in those meds you and Jim sent me this winter?
Remo:cool

 

[Patrick]

Patrick - I 've been working out per your recommendation. BTW, what the heck was in those meds you and Jim sent me this winter?
Remo:cool

I think I've just been struck temporarily blind. Remo, for the love of God, please put some clothes on.

Note to self: locate some brain bleach to clean that image out of my mind.
:eek

 

[LittleRedFlatBack]

Cap Gas woes

I've got to give you the credit Patrick. You've saved me much embarassment from being "spanked" by the gas cap lid because everytime I fill up, I think about your thread and have a giggle.

Dennis